


There's Nothing I Wouldn't Do

by LadyKalan



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Blood and Injury, Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Post-Time Skip
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2020-10-28 01:34:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20770337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyKalan/pseuds/LadyKalan
Summary: Eyes, mouths, hands, arms, legs; there were dozen of ways each body part could distinctly mirror the personalities of the people present. But Byleth didn't have the time to identify those distinctions.She had to focus on not dying.





	There's Nothing I Wouldn't Do

**Author's Note:**

> **Extra information no longer needed for proper context :P**

_Five months ago, Byleth awoke from her stasis._

_Four months ago, is the last time the former mercenary smiled._

_Three months ago, the Professor developed a plan and set it into motion._

_Two months ago, three students were unknowingly convinced to help their teacher prepare a failsafe._

_One month ago, the young woman began searching for her opportunity to "snap."_

_Half a day ago, she finally got her chance._

The group set out on a standard mission. A situation they'd gone through numerous times already. Some bandits were causing trouble for merchants. If they clear out the bandits, the merchants could come to the Monastery. It should have been routine, simple. No complex strategy, no unique situation to take into account. This was Byleth's mistake. Dimitri _was_ a unique situation that should _always_ have been taken into account.

The Professor should have known better than to ask him to stay in one spot. "Can you, _please,_ guard Mercedes and keep the swordmasters away from her?" She only got a grunt in reply. She only ever got a grunt in reply. Annette insisted on being close by, just in case, and her teacher had no reason to say no.

She assumed that Mercedes would alert her if something happened. She assumed that Annette would alert her if something happened to Mercedes. She assumed that she'd notice if the prince left his position. _Never assume something will also work out, just because it worked before. Complacency is how you get killed._ Byleth never should have forgotten her father's words.

By the time the teacher realized how quiet her loudest pupil was being, and cycled back to check; both mages were already knocked out on the ground, seconds away from getting their throats sliced. The rage in the Professor's roaring shout as she charged in, Levin bolts crackling, struck fear into even Felix.

Once she'd secured the girls' safety, and confirmed their health, Byleth scanned the area for Dimitri. She found him on the complete other side of the battlefield, corpses in a pile, bloody smile glued to his face. "I told you to guard Mercedes."

"I did not forget."

"She _and_ Annette almost died."

"It is not my fault they are too weak to protect themselves."

The former mercenary was not truly angry anymore. Concerned, upset, disappointed, but not angry. The girls were okay, and she shouldn't have trusted the blonde to stick to her plan in the first place. But, she also knew an audience was gathering. They were still wary after her battle rage. This was the opportunity she had been looking for.

"C'mon everyone, time to move out!" The group heeded that order with relieved vigor. They could head back, rest, and try (once again) to forget how far gone their prince truly was. That relief only lasted until Dimitri stood up. The moment he did, Byleth spun around and whipped her Relic at his face. The prince ducked on instinct, sprung up, and leveled his lance at the teacher's neck. In only five seconds the air changed from relaxed to icy.

"Ah, finally decided to kill me, have you?"

"No, but I _am_ fed up with your behavior."

"Oh? What will you do about it then?"

"Battlefields and bloodshed are the only things you understand anymore, right? So take your lance with you and meet me at the Training Grounds."

"Heh, very well."

Their weapons were lowered as quickly as they were raised. The Professor turned on her heels and headed out. Her students, dumbstruck, followed behind automatically. It took five minutes of uneasy silence before anyone (Felix) had the courage to speak.

"Are you really planning on fighting that thing?"

"Since it seems to be the only way I'll get through to him, yes."

"I have a really bad feeling about this."

"Don't worry Ashe, you know I can handle myself."

"Even so, I don't know if I can stomach watching that kind of battle."

"...Mercedes, you won't _be_ watching."

"Wait, what? Professor you can't seriously intend to fight Dimitri without spectators!"

"I can, and I do. This isn't the kind of fight that _should_ be watched, Sylvain. I don't want any of you to be witness to this."

"Professor, I doubt _any_ of us would be comfortable with you two fighting unsupervised. Even if you were just using training weapons. But to bring your _Hero's Relics_ into this as well..."

"The results could be catastrophic!"

"**sigh** Alright Ingrid, Annette, I understand your concerns. I can't really stop you guys from coming to watch. But I need you to promise me, that unless I _ask_ for assistance, you will not interfere. I can't guarantee your safety otherwise. Am I understood?"

**"Yes Professor!"**

. . .

Dimitri was the first one to enter the Training Grounds, Byleth was the last. Once the teacher stepped into the arena, her students' chatter died down to nothing. She unsheathed her sword, the prince tightened his grip on his lance, and without a word or gesture exchanged, the battle began.

**Terrifying** was the only word the onlookers could think of. Watching the strongest among them fight, with their strongest weapons, had everyone shuddering. It was apparent that neither opponent was holding back. Wind blew with their every swing, the stands shook with their every clash, and the oppressive air between them was heavy enough to choke anyone who got too close.

The battle raged on for what seemed like hours, yet no one seemed to tire in the slightest. Not the fighters, or the watchers. Some (Sylvain, Annette, Ashe) started to wonder if the fight would ever end. Thankfully Dimitri started to slow down soon after.

The blonde still didn't look tired, just distracted. His eyes wandered, his grip loosened, and his reactions lagged behind. Byleth noticed all of this, adjusted accordingly, and kept going. Until finally, she grew more annoyed with the interruptions, than the man being interrupted did.

Instead of dashing forward again after being pushed back, she stopped entirely, turned to the last spot bright blue eyes had stopped at, and slashed at the air there. "Leave him alone!" Spectators and fighter alike stared at the Professor in startled shock. "Enough already! Just let him rest!"

"...What is she doing?"

"What are you doing?"

"I'm trying to get them to leave you alone. Your father, your stepmother, Glenn, Dedue, whoever it is. You have to stop listening to them! It's going to get you killed!"

"You, _you're_ trying to get _my_ ghosts to leave me alone?"

"It's either that or I make you ignore them. And you clearly don't want to ignore them."

From the stands, everyone else watched the back and forth in complete confusion. The two in the arena had already blocked the others out; their conversation indecipherable to all observers.

"G-ghosts? His highness is haunted?"

"I'm not sure what they're talking about Ashe, but I don't think they're real ghosts."

"Dedue... Why would Dedue be...?"

Dimitri scoffed, dismissing her actions, and brushing off her words. "Enough stalling Professor. If you've tired of our match, just say so."

Byleth huffed, both frustrated and desperate to get through to the prince. "This _is_ our match. I'm fighting your demons because you don't want to!"

"They are not demons, and your efforts are futile!"

"How would you know that? You've never tried to resist!"

"Silence. You know not of what you speak!"

"You're the one who doesn't know! Have you even questioned it?! Because it's not normal Dimitri! You shouldn't be hearing voices from people long dead!"

Slowly, the other students began piecing together the situation. "Wait... hearing voices? Isn't that, a type of, of hallucination? Has Dimitri been hallucinating this whole time?"

"He did mention hearing Glenn's voice sometimes... But I thought he meant it in a nostalgic way. Not, not literally."

"Enough! What could you possibly understand?!"

"Everything! All of it! You think you're the only person haunted by the dead?!"

The will to fight got knocked out of the prince at those words.

"...What?"

The gentle tone redirected everyone's attention back to the pair below. Dimitri looked more vulnerable than he had in years. Byleth looked more somber than she ever had before.

"A transparent figure that won't leave your view, even when you close your eyes. Even when you fall asleep. A voice you can't tune out, no matter how much noise you surround yourself with. A feeling of being watched, singled out, but you can never find the gaze responsible. Even in a group where you know everyone is looking at you. Even when you know that you're completely alone.

Demanding, pleading, begging, crying, yelling screaming: an endless barrage of requests and last wishes. 'Do this one thing for me and I can finally pass on. I'll truly be pacified.' But no matter what you do, no matter what wishes you grant, they are _never_ satisfied. They will ask and ask and ask of you until the day _you_ pass on."

Byleth only felt a little bad for twisting the nature of her relationship with Sothis. At that point, she cared more about getting Dimitri to listen to her, than she did about keeping her record of honesty.

Three friends looked at each other as their Professor spoke, with the growing realization that this whole time, they didn't know _anything_ important. "That, that's what he's been going through? This whole time? For _nine years_?"

"I, I knew he felt guilty about it, but this is..."

"He never said anything about all of this. Why didn't... did he not trust us?"

Gradually, the expressions and posture from a more innocent time returned to the blonde. "You... you see them too?"

"What, you thought you were special? That no one else in the world has ever gone through this? Did you think you were _unique_ Dimitri?"

"I-"

"Because you're not. The only unique part of your situation, is that you've done this to yourself."

Just as Byleth's words could instantly turn the boar back into an earnest prince, so too could her words immediately turn that prince back into a raging boar. "Wha- are you saying that was _my_ fault? I am not the one who killed my family! I never asked for their deaths!"

"That's not what I meant. _I_ know what it means to be haunted, but _you_ clearly don't."

"Excuse me?!" 

There was a glimmer in his eyes then. A look more severe and deadly than anything directed at the teacher before. She just needed to push a bit further.

"You have no ghosts. There are no figures, no voices, no requests. If they were real you would not be forgetting their faces, as I know you are. It's all in your own head. 'The dead must have their tribute'? Don't make me laugh! Those are just your own selfish delusions! The dead "must have" nothing! They are already gone!"

A cracking noise briefly echoed through the room. The blonde's grip on Areadbhar was so severe, even the Relic could not handle the pressure. But before anyone could place the origin of the sound, or even truly process what they'd heard, the prince had decided that he didn't want to listen anymore.

"SILENCE!" Dimitri brought his lance to waist level and rushed at the former mercenary, killing intent practically radiating off of his being.

The enraged charge raised the anxiety of everyone in the room to eleven. Everyone except for one very calm teacher.

_Now!_

Byleth shifted her stance, feet firmly on the ground, knees bent, hands and Relic at waist level. As if she was going to bring her sword up to wherever the prince was aiming, and block his upcoming jab at the last second. To the seasoned fighter, however, it was clear she was going to do no such thing.

Her stance was of someone preparing to take a hit, yes. But her grip was far too relaxed. Anything that hit the sword would send it flying. In fact, her arms were too relaxed as well. As if she didn't intend on raising them at all.

Most of the students watching didn't pick up on any of that. They were more focused on what Dimitri might do to Byleth, not on how Byleth would respond to Dimitri. Felix, of course, had no such concern. He knew better than most that the former mercenary would not get hurt, unless she allowed it to happen. Something he realized, a little too late, was about to occur.

The swordmaster watched his teacher's arm tense as the boar got close. Not to pick up the sword and block, but to throw it away entirely. In the Professor's peripheral, Felix jumped from his seat. "Don't!" His horrified face was the last thing the former mercenary saw, before she dropped her sword, and closed her eyes.

. . .

. . .

. . .

**Hot**

That was the only sensation Byleth could feel. Her stomach was burning. Her lungs were burning. If her heart worked it would likely be burning as well.

Disappoint welled up inside of her. _I didn't think he was truly this far gone. _But that feeling was immediately pushed aside, as her determination to carry this through rushed back in.

She quickly opened her eyes and took in the scene. Dimitri stood before her, wide eyed, mouth ajar, grip slackened. Behind him, her gaze settled on Felix, from where he had risen from his seat. His fists and teeth were clenched, a fire lit inside his eyes. No doubt everyone had some unique reaction to the scene. Eyes, mouths, hands, arms, legs; there were dozen of ways each body part could distinctly mirror the personalities of the people present. But Byleth didn't have the time to identify those distinctions.

She had to focus on not dying.

Slowing time to a crawl allowed her to calmly assess and then remedy the situation. With shaking hands, the teacher reached up to grasp the lance's handle. Though she could not hear them, some from the stands were undoubtedly beginning to move towards her. Her words likely slurred when she called out. "Stay where you are!" Even in this state, the Professor trusted, that her students trusted her, enough to obey her command.

A cough raked through her body, spewing blood out in front of her, loosening her grip, but she would not be deterred. With the last of her strength, Byleth yanked the Hero's Relic out of her abdomen. And her efforts were rewarded with a fountain of blood pouring from her mouth. Obstruction removed from the wound, she could then pool all of her healing energy into the hole.

It felt like an hour had passed before the teacher was satisfied that she would not die. But it was only truly two minutes, before she let time return to normal. A sigh of relief escaped her as she allowed herself to look up again. Everyone had stayed out of the arena, as she knew they would. Their eyes held no horror in them, <strike>likely because they knew their Professor wasn't about to die in front of their eyes while they stood there helpless to save her</strike> only concern, shock, and fear. That was okay, that she could work with.

_I told you all not to come watch us for a reason._

Dimitri, however, was another story. Horror seemed to be the only emotion he _could_ express. "What were you thinking! You could have dodged that! Why did you let me hit you?!"

Byleth gathered the remaining blood still sitting in her mouth, and turned to the side to spit it out. "Because I could tell what you were thinking. A whim reflected through your eyes, growing the longer I talked. 'If I could just hit her once, I'd feel so much better.' So I let you hit me. You feel better now, right?" She wiped the blood from her mouth as she spoke. Everyone present grew more and more bewildered at their teacher's nonchalant attitude. No one could wrap their mind around her behavior. Least of all Dimitri.

"W-what kind of nonsense is that?! I, I could have killed you..."

"I know. If I didn't get Annette, Mercedes, and Flayn to alternate teaching me Faith magic every spare chance they got for the last two months, I wouldn't have been able to heal myself fast enough. Flayn isn't even here, and Annette and Mercedes would've been too shocked and tired to act in time. So I very easily could have died just now."

"Then why-"

"But _you_ had no idea I'd been learning Faith magic. From your perspective, I _should_ have died just now. Yet, you considered it anyway. So in your head, 'if I could just hit her once,' must've also meant, 'if I could just kill her.' Am I wrong?"

Horror was pushed out of the blonde's gaze, as a sickening realization consumed him. The students in the stands all sat back down, as they slowly came to understand the method to Byleth's madness.

"You thought killing me would make you feel better. Therefore, I gave you the chance to see me dying by your hand. So, do you feel better now, Dimitri?"

Suddenly exhausted, the prince could only hang his head. "Of course I don't..."

"I figured you wouldn't."

"But still, why go so far?! Surely there was a less extreme way to-"

"Yes, there were. Several in fact. All of them were safer and faster. But this was the method I chose, because it communicated two points instead of just one."

"...What two points?"

The teacher knelt down to pick up the Relics as she spoke. The observing students (Felix included) all clung to their Professor's words, enraptured by this spontaneous lesson she had demonstrated. She brought Dimitri back to (some semblance of) normal with one action. One crazy, reckless, life shortening, action. Surely her reasoning was something they'd never be able to comprehend, unless they heard it from her mouth specifically.

"Point one, is that you do still have a heart. You hold remorse for your behavior. You regret the blood caked onto your hands. You feel concern for your allies. You are still _you,_ Dimitri."

No one else could see it except for Byleth. How water welled up in ocean blue eyes. She sheathed her sword, picked up the lance, and locked gazes with the drowning man in front of her.

"I'm sure every single person here, knows that you could not kill me in a serious fight, unless I let you do it. And so, point two, is that I _would_ let you do it."

Quiet gasps echoed from above. Annette and Ashe were distinct above the collective. If she looked over in that moment, the teacher would have seen nothing but stunned faces in the crowd. But Byleth did not look over. She refused to look at anything except Dimitri, who had a stunned expression of his own.

"W-what?"

After a deep breath, the Professor began the speech she had rehearsed for months. Lines practiced over and over again, until she could say every word with the same ease and confidence she held, when saying 'hello' to the Gatekeeper.

"Dimitri, <strike>I miss your smile</strike> _no one_ is more important to this war, than you are. _You_ are the catalyst for everything we do. <strike>My sword is yours.</strike> Your friends fight for _you,_ your lords fight for _you,_ your _subjects_ fight for _you._ They need you to come back and lead them. <strike>I need you.</strike> Your people need you back, your Kingdom needs you back, _Fodlan_ needs you back. And I will do _anything_ to make that happen. <strike>Dying for you, is easy for me.</strike> So if letting you kill me is all I need to do to bring you back, I'll consent in a _heartbeat."_

Finally done confessing and proving her unyielding devotion, Byleth held Areadbhar up, and offered it to the prince. "Is that what I need to do Dimitri? Do I need to let you strike me down, for real?"

With shaking hands, the blonde accepted the Relic. Tears he likely didn't realize were there, began to trickle down his face. He stared at his bloodied hands for nearly a minute, before finding his voice again. "No. No you don't."

The students in the stands could no longer hear the conversation, but they didn't have to. The moment their Professor smiled, her first _true_ smile in four months; they all knew this war had finally become winnable.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even know. I tried.
> 
> Let me know what you think of this mess.
> 
> Edit: I added the full beginning. **Looks at new word count.** Or I added everything before the ending, whichever works. Anyway, the story's actually complete now. Woo!


End file.
